Tag Archives: Asylum seekers

Tony Abbott’s business proposal for an Indonesian fisherman

On the 23rd August 2013, Australian Prime Minister-in-waiting Tony Abbott announced a new policy of regional deterrence for asylum seekers hoping to settle in Australia. The policy included the ability to buy un-seaworthy boats from Indonesian fishermen. (Otherwise known as the boat-buy back scheme.) This policy would ensure that the boats did not end up in the hands of people smugglers, and be responsible for the drownings of asylum seekers at sea.

In an exclusive for WhyDev, I managed to dig up the original email that Abbott sent to Indonesian fishermen. It is clearly inspired by the Nigerian bank scams that anyone with an email address is sure to be familiar with. This exclusive correspondence is below:

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Dear Respected Indonesian Fisherman,

GREETINGS,

Permit me to inform you of my desire of going into business relationship with you. I got your contact from the International web site directory. I prayed over it and selected your name among other names due to it’s esteeming nature and the recommendations given to me as a reputable and trust worthy person I can do business with and by the recommendations I must not hesitate to confide in you for this simple and sincere business.

I am Anthony John Abbott, the only son of Mr. and Mrs. Richard Henry Abbott. My father was English-born and I was born in Newcastle upon Tyne. However, my father moved our family in 1960 to Australia by boat and we settled in northern Sydney. Although I attended a Catholic seminary, I am now an elected representative of the Australian people. Recently, with the death of the Australian Labor Party, the Treasury secretly told me that they have a sum of $20.000.000 (Twenty Million Dollars) for a policy of the regional deterrence of people smuggling left in a suspense account in the Treasury in Canberra.

It was also explained to me that because of the extraordinary number of boats and asylum seekers making their way to Australia, that I should seek for a God fearing foreign partner in a country of my choice where I will transfer this money and use it for buying back their fishing boats. Sir, we are honourably seeking your assistance in the following ways.

  1. To provide a Bank account where this money will be transferred to.
  2. Handing over of your fishing boat vessel upon receipt of Bank transfer.

Moreover, we are willing to offer you a bounty payment for specific information that leads to the arrest of people smugglers in your village.  Please feel free to contact me via this email address:

Tony.Abbott.MP@aph.gov.au

Anticipating to hear from you soon.

Thanks and God Bless

Best Regards

The Honourable Anthony John Abbott, Prime Minister of Australia

PLEASE FOR PRIVATE AND SECUTIRY REASONS, REPLY ME VIA EMAIL:

Tony.Abbott.MP@aph.gov.au

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